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Almost everyone believes that your most effective attribute, from the standpoint of flirting, is the eye, and that your success in flirting depends, first and foremost, on the power and the art of your eye appeal. "Eye contact is the first thing that I look for," says 28-year-old Andrea Wilson of Atlanta. "Once you establish eye contact, along with a smile, the guy will normally smile back at you. If you're walking toward a guy, he may turn around and look at you once you've passed him by. I call that the 'double take.' That's when you know you've got him."
The best approach to getting someone's attention is simple. If you see something you like, send a series of powerful eye signals. If you look long enough, you're bound to get a response. But be careful. There is a fine line between staring and being rude. Most experts recommend an on-and-off approach.
Next is the opener--something to get the attention of that special someone. Compliments are always appropriate and can often lead to conversation. "Complimenting a person on how they look, what they are wearing, or even how their hair is styled are subtle ways to let a person know that you're interested," says Dr. Jeff Gardere, author of Love Prescription: Healing Our Hearts Through Love. "A plain 'hello' while looking into a man's eyes or a 'thank you' while maintaining eye contact as he opens the door is also a subtle but effective flirting method."
Men can employ the art of flirtation as well with a series of openers: "That's a beautiful dress you have on," "You have a wonderful smile," "That color really looks good on you," or "I love the fragrance you're wearing ... what is it?" Many Brothers realize that women are flattered when a man takes the time to notice their fragrance and attributes and are much more receptive to conversation.
Sisters should also begin with a complimentary opener. "That'sa stylish suit you have on," "I love your tie. It looks great with that suit," or "That's a nice briefcase ... where'd you buy it?" According to experts, women are less likely to base their comments on a man's body, but are more likely to use body language as a flirtation method. A slight toss of the hair, an extra sway in the wall or a subtle cross of the legs when sitting beside a handsome suitor are a few of the non-verbal methods of getting a man's attention.
Women may also use general openers that ask for a man's assistance: "Do you know how to get to this location?" or "Do you have change for a dollar?" This type of flirtation is twofold: It makes the man feel needed, thereby stroking his ego, and it creates an immediate exchange of information.
Written by Mary Nicole Hicks
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